Alaskan SWAT Team vs. Teen Pizza Thieves

As if Alaskans don't have enough of a nincompoop reputation to live down after electing and supporting Sarah Palin, apparently their police can't handle a stolen pizza without calling in a SWAT team.  According to the Associated Press, Anchorage Police say a plot to steal a delivery man’s pizza warranted use of a SWAT team. The police spokesman says a man trying to deliver a pizza order this weekend was confronted by a guy with a gun and a stick, and then three other young people attacked him from behind, grabbed the pizza he was delivering but ran away without taking his money (wow...genius). The delivery man then followed one of his attackers to a home where police arrested her. The other suspects then barricaded themselves somewhere in the home, prompting authorities to call in a SWAT team that took care of the rest.  

Yes folks, SWAT to deal with teenagers stealing pizza. Hmmm... Is there a way to get their oil without keeping the state? :/

http://cnews.canoe.ca/CNEWS/WeirdNews/2010/03/23/13327591-ap.html

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Christmas Arrested in Florida

So apparently, in Florida it's possible to actually arrest Christmas.

Click below to enlarge the image
and note the second defendant's name.

I couldn't make this stuff up if I tried. :)

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Tasing Little Kids

I always wondered if I had what it takes to be a parent in our society. I mean, raising and taking care of children in our culture just looks so damn challenging these days. However, if it is now socially acceptable to get a cop to tase and cuff 65 pound preteen girls, as implied by the link below... well, how hard can it all be?

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/years/2009/1118091taser1.html

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Go Medium

Earlier today, I was reading Derren Brown's blog (where I should confess I get a noticeable amount of material for this blog from) and I came across a link to this ridiculous story about Police in the UK who blew £20,000 (about 33,400 American dollars) investigating the "murder" of a man who's death was already ruled a suicide until so-called psychics spewed forth stories of animal-related imagery.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/6508875/Detectives-launch-20000-murder-inquiry-after-bogus-tip-off-from-mystics.html

Once again, if you choose to believe in the psychic phenomena, that's your business... but no mater what country you live in, before you spend public or taxpayer money on something supernatural, please ask yourself first: "If any psychic is so real, why haven't they either won the lotto or collected a million bucks from James Randi?" Because let me tell you, if I had any kind of supernatural intuitive powers, I'd help lots of people, sure ...but I'm getting paid first! ;)

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Re-Peto

OK, let's say you're an undercover cop specializing in cyber-crime and your current assignment is busting pedophiles who solicit children online. I imagine, in that role, you'd have to think that any perpetrator ever caught being so unbelievably reprehensible would so dread being caught ever again that a repeat offender would likely:

1. Change up their M.O. a bit.
2. Consider skipping town permanently.
3. Try to learn from the experience of getting caught, as to not fall for the same tricks and procedures again.
4. Change up their daily habits as to... Hmmm, let's say... not be found and busted pulling into the exact same flippin' parking spot they were arrested in before, possibly giving the arresting officer deja vu.

Well, fortunately for Lt. Jeff Braley of Warren County in Ohio, according to the link below, one of his perps was apparently way too stupid for all of that.

http://news.cincinnati.com/article/20081224/NEWS0107/312240023

So, big-time kudos to Lt. Braley for his work ...but to Christopher Sefakis of South Lebanon Ohio, I am going to have to give you a rating of 8 out of 10 Zombie Darwins and a bonus of one castrated bipolar werewolf, effective the instant your sorry ass is found guilty! I mean, for the love of God, Mr. Sefakis... I have to say, the thankful super-singular upside to you liking young boys:

Odds are, you wont reproduce!

Merry frikkin' X-Mas!